Bragging Is For Lovers

L post

A funny thing happened at mine and C’s high school reunion: Instead asking me about my life or my work or the classic “so what are you up to these days,” most people wanted to know about my relationship or to talk about the dating blog. Shoutout to a male classmate who let it be known that he didn’t know I was funny until reading this. Thanks dude, guess that’s the reason you tried to light my hair on fire at a high school football game? Whoa, that got dark for a sec, sorry.

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C, the perpetual charmer, got to dodge dating questions by professing she’s single because she hates everyone (which is mostly true because most people are hatable). Me on the other hand, I have no such escape route. I was left stammering about Steve Martin and our relationship and how great he is and it is.

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The weird thing about being in a great relationship is my weird inability to talk about it in public.

I wonder if people would read/enjoy this blog if I just used it to document all the adorable shit that comes out of his mouth. Don’t you guys just want to know about the living nightmares C and I willingly take home? Do you really want to hear about how Steve Martin and I have danced in my tiny studio apartment to Foreigner, or how we go on bowling and hot dog dates, or the circumstances under which we exchanged “I love you” for the first time? Did you just puke in your mouth in a little? MY FEAR EXACTLY (that shit tastes terrible and I care about you).

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Honestly, I’m way more comfortable talking about the negative things that happen in my dating life because they’re easier to make a joke out of. Loving someone is full of funny silly ridiculous moments too of course, but as I have yet to fart in front of him, they’re less straightforward to write about. The first fart story though is sure to be a doozy.

So while I yammered on about Steve Martin and the status of the blog to the people who brought it up at the reunion, it left me feeling really strange. Bragging about the unbelievably healthy partnership I’ve found just feels too good to be true. Some days he feels too good to be true. As someone who has lived a perpetual glass half empty keep your expectations low so you never get hurt if you can laugh through it you can live through it overall worst case scenario lifestyle, I don’t really know how to express this happiness stuff. But I’m working on it.

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